Apparently I shouldn't bring eggs for lunch!
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Our door sign
Thomas and I found the standard door signs boring so we made our own. It looks cool! It looks even cooler in color but we didn't have a nearby printer with colors.
Start voting!
After enjoying my new single life I've discovered that certain people I know are sort of prudish have different views on picking up people than I do. However, now this can be settled! I've added a nice poll in the sidebar so you can cast your vote.
Naturally I expect myself to be right given that this is my blog but only time will show!
Naturally I expect myself to be right given that this is my blog but only time will show!
Friday, February 22, 2008
Dirty
And not in the good way! ;) I seriously need to do something about my dirty dishes. Luckily I can now since I washed all my dishcloths yesterday. Go me! ;)
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Today's bad sexual joke
I bought two hot dogs for lunch today. For some reason they always put a ridiculous amount of dressing in. So I haven't been walking very far next to Thomas and eating before I get ketchup on my hand and my jacket (and my pants but I didn't discover that until later).
Me: Argh! [start licking ketchup of my hand]
Thomas: Eww! You're licking!
Me: Funny. That's not the reaction I usually get.
Thomas: I expected you to make a joke about my mom.
Me: Argh! [start licking ketchup of my hand]
Thomas: Eww! You're licking!
Me: Funny. That's not the reaction I usually get.
Thomas: I expected you to make a joke about my mom.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
I can't believe this!
I'm ill again! :( That's just ridiculous! I took a day home today so I'm hoping I'll be well tomorrow. I doubt it, though.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Who's badass?
That's right! Me! ;) And not only because I sort of cleaned a bit up today and found an old pair of sunglasses that make me look totally cool! Nope, the real reason is that I'm going to play badminton with my brother in an hour. That's badass! ;)
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Yet another bet
If you have seen a few of my recent posts on my picture blog like one about me being wrapped in tin foil or me going to bed very late both sans alcohol, you might be wondering what is going on. I usually get drunk and do silly stuff, not stay sober. So what's the deal?
I've made a bet with Thomas. We're both laying off alcohol in February. An exception, though, is any function with open bar. Not exploiting an open bar leads to bad karma and nobody wants that! If we succeed, we are going to Bryggeriet and eating Australian/South American roast of rump. It is ridiculously delicious! However, the price is also a bit more than you can usually justify spending on a meal as a student. But we'll have the money because of all the money we haven't spend on alcohol. Clever, eh?
So what happens if we fail? Well, if just one fails, it's easy. That person picks up the tab when we go out for the celebration dinner. And will have to stand being mocked the entire dinner! If we both fail, we'll try again in March.
The most fun in this bet so far for me has been peoples reactions. Many have been shocked and asked why in the world I/we would do that!* Well, because we felt like it. It's fun to see how addicted to alcohol one is. Not in a physical way -- there's no addiction there -- but in a social way. Others have been quite impressed that I'm able to decide that I wont have any alcohol among other drinking people and then sticking to it.
It's really not been hard so far. Thomas has often been present as a partner in crime. But even without him it's easy to see some of the upsides of drinking:
So all in all I think it's worth it. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I might even try this a few times when February is over. I know my mom will think that it's a fantastic idea!
* In the first attempt I typed "bed" instead of "bet". That made those two sentences that much more fun!
I've made a bet with Thomas. We're both laying off alcohol in February. An exception, though, is any function with open bar. Not exploiting an open bar leads to bad karma and nobody wants that! If we succeed, we are going to Bryggeriet and eating Australian/South American roast of rump. It is ridiculously delicious! However, the price is also a bit more than you can usually justify spending on a meal as a student. But we'll have the money because of all the money we haven't spend on alcohol. Clever, eh?
So what happens if we fail? Well, if just one fails, it's easy. That person picks up the tab when we go out for the celebration dinner. And will have to stand being mocked the entire dinner! If we both fail, we'll try again in March.
The most fun in this bet so far for me has been peoples reactions. Many have been shocked and asked why in the world I/we would do that!* Well, because we felt like it. It's fun to see how addicted to alcohol one is. Not in a physical way -- there's no addiction there -- but in a social way. Others have been quite impressed that I'm able to decide that I wont have any alcohol among other drinking people and then sticking to it.
It's really not been hard so far. Thomas has often been present as a partner in crime. But even without him it's easy to see some of the upsides of drinking:
- No hangovers.
- A lot of money saved.
- No hangovers. Yeah, I really enjoy that one.
- When everybody else is drunk and acting all silly, I wont be drunk.
- No hangovers.
- I wont pass out early from too much alcohol. I don't know if this is just something I've been experiencing -- I'll have to check with Thomas -- but when everyone else wants to go home, I'm still game! I'm simply just up for more partying! I guess this can be a downside as well because eventually people leave and I'll go home too but with my unfulfilled party lust still lurking.
- No hangovers. I really can't stress that enough.
So all in all I think it's worth it. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I might even try this a few times when February is over. I know my mom will think that it's a fantastic idea!
* In the first attempt I typed "bed" instead of "bet". That made those two sentences that much more fun!
My new office
This is me at my new office! Wearing a cap I found among my stuff because I'm having a bad hair day. ;)
Goodnight
It's definitely been a while since I went to bed this late (early ;)) completely sober! I like it now. Tomorrow I'll love it! ;) Sleep well.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Friday, February 08, 2008
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Candy bar wrapping
Who can resist a candy bar that has a sexual innuendo printed on the wrapping!? ;)
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
My idea of romance
A few weeks ago I found an article about being more romantic. I'm currently very single* so I don't get exposed to romance that much. Reading an article like that does not make me feel like I'm missing out. On the contrary. I laughed out loud or shuddered with repugnance** muttering "Eww!" to myself at most of the suggestions.
I'm not really the romantic type. At least not in a classical way. I typically find sappy romance stuff cheesy and most of all vomit inducing. I can think of 3 factors in this.
First of all personal preference. I'm not really that into poetry or fluffy stuffed animals with hearts attached. They just don't do anything for me. So giving me stuff like that would be giving me stuff I find pointless and let's face it: That really isn't romantic. I feel almost the same way about flowers. While they're initially pretty, they'll wither and I'll have to throw them away. And I feel bad throwing away something that other people made an effort to get me. An exception is wild flowers that people pick from their own garden. I can appreciate them knowing that they would wither in the garden as well.
The second factor is money. It is closely related to the first. I think a lot of the "romantic" stuff is just a waste of money. So on top of giving me something I find useless, you also waste money on it. Call me a materialistic geek but I can't help but think of all the gadgets the same money could have bought! I mean, bouquets of flowers are expensive. It doesn't take take that many before you could have bought a Wi-Fi base station instead! And I know what I prefer given the choice between the two.
The third is my idea of relationships. This is mostly in connection with disgusting poems. To me a relationship is about two*** independent equals deciding to partner up because it seems better than just being one. The whole "You complete me" or "You're my other half" is a bit too codependent for my taste. It implies that you only make sense in connection with the other person. When you're by yourself, you apparently have a huge void that makes you less of a person and prevents you from living fully. That's bullshit! I'm fully capable and functional by myself. As Alanis Morissette put it "I don't wanna be your other half, I believe that 1 and 1 make 2".
I also loathe the dependent "I need you", "You're my life", or "I cannot live without you". Get a life. Really. Saying stuff like that is not romantic. It is just creepy. You shouldn't be dependent on somebody else for your happiness. See above about being fully capable and functional by yourself. Further it's a pretty huge burden to put on somebody else. You're just shifting the entire responsibility for your life onto another person. That's hardly a sensible thing to do.
So what do I find romantic? It's not that complicated. I enjoy stuff that shows that you know me, care about me, and try to make me happy. Let me give an example. It takes place back when the MacBook was first launched. Ever since the launch of the MacBook Pro I had been waiting impatiently for the Intel version of the iBook. My (then) boyfriend naturally knew this. The MacBook was finally launched while I was at a lecture. My boyfriend sent my a text message telling me they had arrived. I was super excited! When I got back to my office, he had printed out the comparison sheet with both the black and the white MacBook. Next to them he
had written the price if I chose to upgrade them to the largest possible model. That is romantic to me.
* If you thought that being single is binary, think again!
** Yeah, I totally found that word in a dictionary!
*** Or more, I guess, if you're into that stuff.
I'm not really the romantic type. At least not in a classical way. I typically find sappy romance stuff cheesy and most of all vomit inducing. I can think of 3 factors in this.
First of all personal preference. I'm not really that into poetry or fluffy stuffed animals with hearts attached. They just don't do anything for me. So giving me stuff like that would be giving me stuff I find pointless and let's face it: That really isn't romantic. I feel almost the same way about flowers. While they're initially pretty, they'll wither and I'll have to throw them away. And I feel bad throwing away something that other people made an effort to get me. An exception is wild flowers that people pick from their own garden. I can appreciate them knowing that they would wither in the garden as well.
The second factor is money. It is closely related to the first. I think a lot of the "romantic" stuff is just a waste of money. So on top of giving me something I find useless, you also waste money on it. Call me a materialistic geek but I can't help but think of all the gadgets the same money could have bought! I mean, bouquets of flowers are expensive. It doesn't take take that many before you could have bought a Wi-Fi base station instead! And I know what I prefer given the choice between the two.
The third is my idea of relationships. This is mostly in connection with disgusting poems. To me a relationship is about two*** independent equals deciding to partner up because it seems better than just being one. The whole "You complete me" or "You're my other half" is a bit too codependent for my taste. It implies that you only make sense in connection with the other person. When you're by yourself, you apparently have a huge void that makes you less of a person and prevents you from living fully. That's bullshit! I'm fully capable and functional by myself. As Alanis Morissette put it "I don't wanna be your other half, I believe that 1 and 1 make 2".
I also loathe the dependent "I need you", "You're my life", or "I cannot live without you". Get a life. Really. Saying stuff like that is not romantic. It is just creepy. You shouldn't be dependent on somebody else for your happiness. See above about being fully capable and functional by yourself. Further it's a pretty huge burden to put on somebody else. You're just shifting the entire responsibility for your life onto another person. That's hardly a sensible thing to do.
So what do I find romantic? It's not that complicated. I enjoy stuff that shows that you know me, care about me, and try to make me happy. Let me give an example. It takes place back when the MacBook was first launched. Ever since the launch of the MacBook Pro I had been waiting impatiently for the Intel version of the iBook. My (then) boyfriend naturally knew this. The MacBook was finally launched while I was at a lecture. My boyfriend sent my a text message telling me they had arrived. I was super excited! When I got back to my office, he had printed out the comparison sheet with both the black and the white MacBook. Next to them he
had written the price if I chose to upgrade them to the largest possible model. That is romantic to me.
* If you thought that being single is binary, think again!
** Yeah, I totally found that word in a dictionary!
*** Or more, I guess, if you're into that stuff.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Saturday, February 02, 2008
TWSS
Now I don't even have to say it anymore! Actually I don't already as it is. I just have to laugh. Or smile a bit. Or have a certain look on my face. Or maybe just be present. ;)
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Ill
I've been ill for the last week or so. Unfortunately that hasn't stopped the world around me so I've still had stuff to do. Over the weekend I lost my voice. Monday I had an exam. My voice sort of returned a few hours before the exam started. Lucky me. I'm still a bit hoarse, though.
Anyway … I'll have a real update within a week.
Anyway … I'll have a real update within a week.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
My lightsaber
Okay, so some people visiting my apartment have no clue why I would own a cheap lightsaber. I cannot understand how anyone can think that a lightsaber isn't freaking cool! Even though this one is really just a flashlight (it even said so on the back of the package. "Can also be used as a flashlight.") with plastic at the end, I still enjoy picking it up, with one swift movement turn it on and fold it out, and then waving it around. It's awesome! That's what it is! :D
Monday, January 28, 2008
Done with exams
Finally! My exams are over. I passed the last one in quantum information processing. Actually I did more than just pass. But not that much more! ;)
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Nice view
I was sitting in my bed reading about quantum computing. However, the nice view distracted me. :)
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
Can you say "turnover?"
"Turnover." Yes, indeed I can. It's getting late here and I'm very tired. However, even after a refreshing bike ride home and the last part of a quantum information processing hand-in I still need a bit of time to recover from the ridiculously exiting match between Giants and Packers. Wow!
My experience with NFL is very limited. I watched two playoff matches last week and this past Tuesday I watched last year's Super Bowl. All of these were very exciting matches. The first match today between Patriots and Chargers was relatively uninspiring. Seriously, I didn't think you usually had any matches where one team doesn't score a single touchdown. I guess I was wrong. Only more experience will show. (Well, actually just looking at old statistics would show, but where's the fun in that?)
For a while in Giants against Packers I feared that Giants wouldn't score any touchdowns either. I was cheering loudly at each first down which felt kinda sad because, really? There should be something better to cheer at. Even though you have to hand it to Plaxico Burress. He did some badass catches. But then the match got exciting. A lot. For the last 5 minutes of the ordinary time I was biting one of my left fingers. (Yeah, I really mean my finger. I don't bite my nails. That's a bad habit I kicked about 10-15 years ago.) I think I might have a small bruise from it. It might also just be a vein. I'm not sure.
When Lawrence Tynes missed the second field goal and Packers won the coin toss, I was close to despair. Or well, actually it took a bit longer because I didn't know the overtime rules beforehand. However, when I learned it was sudden death, my hopes diminished somewhat. The match was still so insanely exciting that I had to switch to biting a right hand finger instead because the one on my left hand was too sore.
Then the turnover happened, Lawrence Tynes made amends, and everything was all good. Go Giants! As I mentioned last week, I chose NY Giants tentatively as my favorite team. They are now definitely my favorite team.
One might think that I chose them after this match. That was not the case. Neither Patriots nor Chargers really appealed to me after watching the match between them. Since I don't really like to switch teams -- even from a tentatively choice -- I fully went with Giants before the last match. I like the idea of choosing and team and sticking with it.
Besides it just being the first team I sorta fell for, NY Giants appeal to me for a lot of reasons:
So yeah … Go Giants! :D
My experience with NFL is very limited. I watched two playoff matches last week and this past Tuesday I watched last year's Super Bowl. All of these were very exciting matches. The first match today between Patriots and Chargers was relatively uninspiring. Seriously, I didn't think you usually had any matches where one team doesn't score a single touchdown. I guess I was wrong. Only more experience will show. (Well, actually just looking at old statistics would show, but where's the fun in that?)
For a while in Giants against Packers I feared that Giants wouldn't score any touchdowns either. I was cheering loudly at each first down which felt kinda sad because, really? There should be something better to cheer at. Even though you have to hand it to Plaxico Burress. He did some badass catches. But then the match got exciting. A lot. For the last 5 minutes of the ordinary time I was biting one of my left fingers. (Yeah, I really mean my finger. I don't bite my nails. That's a bad habit I kicked about 10-15 years ago.) I think I might have a small bruise from it. It might also just be a vein. I'm not sure.
When Lawrence Tynes missed the second field goal and Packers won the coin toss, I was close to despair. Or well, actually it took a bit longer because I didn't know the overtime rules beforehand. However, when I learned it was sudden death, my hopes diminished somewhat. The match was still so insanely exciting that I had to switch to biting a right hand finger instead because the one on my left hand was too sore.
Then the turnover happened, Lawrence Tynes made amends, and everything was all good. Go Giants! As I mentioned last week, I chose NY Giants tentatively as my favorite team. They are now definitely my favorite team.
One might think that I chose them after this match. That was not the case. Neither Patriots nor Chargers really appealed to me after watching the match between them. Since I don't really like to switch teams -- even from a tentatively choice -- I fully went with Giants before the last match. I like the idea of choosing and team and sticking with it.
Besides it just being the first team I sorta fell for, NY Giants appeal to me for a lot of reasons:
- I like how they played against Dallas Cowboys last week. This was the reason I initially liked them.
- They play in blue and white just like AGF. Yeah, not that serious a reason but it all helps. :)
- I like Eli Manning. People were all "blah blah shadow of his brother blah blah" but I think he did well. And oh yeah … he looks good. Yum. Just saying.
- Plaxico Burress really has magic feet. Damn, he did some nice catches today!
- Did I mention that Eli Manning is hot?
So yeah … Go Giants! :D
Friday, January 18, 2008
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Dirty
I've been good. I cleaned my apartment! Some would say it was about time. They would probably be right. ;) However, I'm happy to inform everyone that spilled beer from close to 2 months ago washes right off. :)
Monday, January 14, 2008
Clean clothes
I could totally make a habit out of this. Actually I think I have. In case you're wondering what my AGF jersey is doing there given that the season stopped for winter break more than a month ago: I figured it would make a good exam t-shirt since it hasn't seen a defeat live so I wore it at my cryptography exam. I'm still waiting for the result.
Sleep and NFL. Mostly NFL.
So I've gotten my circadian rhythm all messed up. Today I got up at around 17. Sleeping to long? A bit, but I got to bed at 5:15 and probably slept 15 minutes later so it's not that bad. So what has happened? Well, since just before Christmas I haven't had any scheduled work during the day since it's exam time (ARGH!). So left to my own devices I've been heading for bed later and later and just sleeping as long as I felt like. My plan now is to fix this before the quarter starts again. I considered trying the 28 hour day but my schedule probably wont be that flexible. Might still be fun, though. More likely I'll be responsible (yeah right) and just choose some time early in the day like at 6, 7, or 8 (probably the latter) and get up at the time each and every day as suggested in How to Become an Early Riser. My brain is still debating the right solution.
One thing to take into consideration is my newest interest, NFL. Always trying to recruit fans for my favorite football* team AGF I told Thomas that he should totally go watch a match with me. He was game if I in return would learn the American football rules. Not one to refuse knowledge I agreed. After reading a bit I was totally ready for my first two matches yesterday. Was it love at first sight? I'm pretty sure it was. I loved the intensity of the sport, how quickly it could turn, and how it was exciting all the way through. Further all the frequent interruptions meant that I could ask questions about what was going on all the time. And do another favorite thing of mine, just talk (yeah, I'm rather wordy). By the second match I was already doing more shouting than everybody else.
In the second match I actually somewhat hoped for a tie by the end. Just so the match would last longer. And I was feeling kinda sad the next matches weren't until Sunday. Of course I instantly confirmed our date for those matches. And for Super Bowl. Yeah, I think I'm addicted. Today I could laugh my ass of at the banner I didn't see when we watched the Giants kick cowboy ass (yay!). Further I could have fun listening to a sad Terell Owens. I have yet to find a favorite team but so far I'll go with NY Giants. I might change my mind after next weekend when I'll have watched more than 4 teams play.
On a final note. Even if you don't find American football interesting -- which makes no sense whatsoever if you've watched a match -- you'll have to appreciate those insanely tight shorts they're wearing. Trying to figure out if there really was a touchdown in a situation where the players were all in one big pile they showed slow motion of the pile from all possible angles. This didn't really give any touchdown insight. However, you got to see a whole lot of ass. "Yum" is all I'm saying.
*Football refers to the kind where you kick the ball, not the kind where you run with the balls in your hands and occasionally kick it. American football is used to refer to the latter.
One thing to take into consideration is my newest interest, NFL. Always trying to recruit fans for my favorite football* team AGF I told Thomas that he should totally go watch a match with me. He was game if I in return would learn the American football rules. Not one to refuse knowledge I agreed. After reading a bit I was totally ready for my first two matches yesterday. Was it love at first sight? I'm pretty sure it was. I loved the intensity of the sport, how quickly it could turn, and how it was exciting all the way through. Further all the frequent interruptions meant that I could ask questions about what was going on all the time. And do another favorite thing of mine, just talk (yeah, I'm rather wordy). By the second match I was already doing more shouting than everybody else.
In the second match I actually somewhat hoped for a tie by the end. Just so the match would last longer. And I was feeling kinda sad the next matches weren't until Sunday. Of course I instantly confirmed our date for those matches. And for Super Bowl. Yeah, I think I'm addicted. Today I could laugh my ass of at the banner I didn't see when we watched the Giants kick cowboy ass (yay!). Further I could have fun listening to a sad Terell Owens. I have yet to find a favorite team but so far I'll go with NY Giants. I might change my mind after next weekend when I'll have watched more than 4 teams play.
On a final note. Even if you don't find American football interesting -- which makes no sense whatsoever if you've watched a match -- you'll have to appreciate those insanely tight shorts they're wearing. Trying to figure out if there really was a touchdown in a situation where the players were all in one big pile they showed slow motion of the pile from all possible angles. This didn't really give any touchdown insight. However, you got to see a whole lot of ass. "Yum" is all I'm saying.
*Football refers to the kind where you kick the ball, not the kind where you run with the balls in your hands and occasionally kick it. American football is used to refer to the latter.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Single by choice
I recently decided to become and stay single. Or well … recently is not really the right word. Let me start with a bit of background information from around 5 years ago and up until now. When I was younger, I was quite the whiny teenager. I was absolutely convinced that I needed a boyfriend to be okay or complete or whatever else weird stuff I was thinking at the time. However, I didn't really like myself so I also had a hard time imagining that somebody else would.
Nonetheless, I got a really sweet boyfriend and we lasted about a year and a half before I broke things off. Not long passed before I had a new boyfriend. And by "not long" I mean "less than 14 days". It was a bad move on my part. For one thing I wasn't entirely ready for a new relationship. Another problem was that while I thought I was in love, I really wasn't. I was flattered that he liked me and enjoyed the company and attention. But I wasn't in love. We lasted about 4 months before I broke up. Again I moved on to a new boyfriend within 14 days. This time it lasted around half a year.
By now I was starting to rethink the whole needing a boyfriend thing. I had started liking myself a bit more and figured that it probably would be a good idea to take some time where I stayed single so I could work a bit on myself. But I fell in love. Again. Yeah, you guessed it. Within 14 days I had a new boyfriend. I thought to myself "Well, while it would be ideal to be single, I can work on myself within a relationship as well."
After 6-7 months we decided to move in together in his apartment. I was very much in love with him and we were already almost living together in practice. Just without all my stuff being there. In hindsight it wasn't the best decision I've ever made. While I don't regret anything, we had a great time, I think I moved in with him way too early.
The relationship lasted a bit longer than 2 and a half year before I decided to move on and out. I did get to work on myself during the relationship with great support from my boyfriend and at this point I really did like myself. Further I had started believing in my life as something I had control over, not something that just happened to me. I still very strongly believe in personal responsibility and owning your actions. While you can't control the world around you and what happens to you, you can definitely control your own actions and reactions.
By now I was very certain that I should be single at least for a while. This time it worked better. After 14 days I was still single. My brain tried to tell me I was in love again. However, this time I knew that I get easily infatuated and it doesn't mean a damn thing. Except maybe that I'm easy to impress. :) It was as if my brain needed somebody to crush on. Knowing better, I ignored it and as time passed, so did the need.
After about 2 months of fun with that and with just being me I started casually hooking up with this guy. From the beginning I made it clear that I didn't want to be in a relationship and I didn't want any commitments. Honesty is something that is very important to me. I'm quite verbose about what's going on in my head and I appreciate the same from others since reading thoughts isn't my specialty. He was okay with that and we kept it casual. However, as time progressed we started acting more and more like a couple. I figured that since we already were one in practice we might as well also be one technically. So he became my boyfriend. Even though I was a bit sceptical, I figured that it might not be that bad.
It took me a month to realize that it was. Or well, it wasn't all that bad. It just wasn't what I wanted. So I broke it off and was very happy to find myself single again. Wise from experience I thought that the "I'll try my best to stay single" principle probably wasn't the best solution for me. At some point I would "fall trough" even though it wasn't my intention. Or at least so says the past. So instead I decided to just set a date until which I should remain single. This was back in mid-December and somewhat arbitrarily my choice fell on June 22 2008. So this is my current plan.
I told a friend and she looked at me hesitating a bit then said, "I … don't really think you are able to do that. [pause] I'm willing to make a bet on it." Fully trusting myself I gladly accepted. I also arranged bets with another friend and both my siblings. Looking back at my history I get why people don't think I can do this. I've gotten the reaction "I'll believe it when I see it" a lot. However, I'm a wiser person now and I look forward to cashing in!
Nonetheless, I got a really sweet boyfriend and we lasted about a year and a half before I broke things off. Not long passed before I had a new boyfriend. And by "not long" I mean "less than 14 days". It was a bad move on my part. For one thing I wasn't entirely ready for a new relationship. Another problem was that while I thought I was in love, I really wasn't. I was flattered that he liked me and enjoyed the company and attention. But I wasn't in love. We lasted about 4 months before I broke up. Again I moved on to a new boyfriend within 14 days. This time it lasted around half a year.
By now I was starting to rethink the whole needing a boyfriend thing. I had started liking myself a bit more and figured that it probably would be a good idea to take some time where I stayed single so I could work a bit on myself. But I fell in love. Again. Yeah, you guessed it. Within 14 days I had a new boyfriend. I thought to myself "Well, while it would be ideal to be single, I can work on myself within a relationship as well."
After 6-7 months we decided to move in together in his apartment. I was very much in love with him and we were already almost living together in practice. Just without all my stuff being there. In hindsight it wasn't the best decision I've ever made. While I don't regret anything, we had a great time, I think I moved in with him way too early.
The relationship lasted a bit longer than 2 and a half year before I decided to move on and out. I did get to work on myself during the relationship with great support from my boyfriend and at this point I really did like myself. Further I had started believing in my life as something I had control over, not something that just happened to me. I still very strongly believe in personal responsibility and owning your actions. While you can't control the world around you and what happens to you, you can definitely control your own actions and reactions.
By now I was very certain that I should be single at least for a while. This time it worked better. After 14 days I was still single. My brain tried to tell me I was in love again. However, this time I knew that I get easily infatuated and it doesn't mean a damn thing. Except maybe that I'm easy to impress. :) It was as if my brain needed somebody to crush on. Knowing better, I ignored it and as time passed, so did the need.
After about 2 months of fun with that and with just being me I started casually hooking up with this guy. From the beginning I made it clear that I didn't want to be in a relationship and I didn't want any commitments. Honesty is something that is very important to me. I'm quite verbose about what's going on in my head and I appreciate the same from others since reading thoughts isn't my specialty. He was okay with that and we kept it casual. However, as time progressed we started acting more and more like a couple. I figured that since we already were one in practice we might as well also be one technically. So he became my boyfriend. Even though I was a bit sceptical, I figured that it might not be that bad.
It took me a month to realize that it was. Or well, it wasn't all that bad. It just wasn't what I wanted. So I broke it off and was very happy to find myself single again. Wise from experience I thought that the "I'll try my best to stay single" principle probably wasn't the best solution for me. At some point I would "fall trough" even though it wasn't my intention. Or at least so says the past. So instead I decided to just set a date until which I should remain single. This was back in mid-December and somewhat arbitrarily my choice fell on June 22 2008. So this is my current plan.
I told a friend and she looked at me hesitating a bit then said, "I … don't really think you are able to do that. [pause] I'm willing to make a bet on it." Fully trusting myself I gladly accepted. I also arranged bets with another friend and both my siblings. Looking back at my history I get why people don't think I can do this. I've gotten the reaction "I'll believe it when I see it" a lot. However, I'm a wiser person now and I look forward to cashing in!
Friday, January 04, 2008
Thursday, January 03, 2008
I'm creative!
I have decorated my walls with my AGF jerseys. It looks good. Can't have anybody showing up and not knowing what team I support. :)
Monday, December 31, 2007
Is that?
Yes, it is. Me in color. Looking sweet and innocent for the new year. Wonder if I'm fooling anyone. ;)
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Friday, December 28, 2007
Food
Now this is what I call a nice breakfast! :D Yeah, I know, it's late for breakfast. I don't care.
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